End of the Year Thoughts

  As 2014 comes to an end, I find myself back at the hospital. I've been here since this past Monday. It seems that my creatinine level jumped up to 6.94 when it should be closer to 1.0. This blows chunks. For yet another year, I'm missing out on spending New Year's Eve with my friends. I've also missed more work. Fortunately, I have New Year's Eve and Day off and I should be back at work Friday. That's all for now.
  Mike

How things are going so far

  Things were improving earlier this year. I had finally paid off both my MasterCard and Discover accounts. Finally, I'd have enough money to build up my checking and savings accounts. Then I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. This meant that I was going to be on medication for the rest of my life. A setback, yes, but since I had insurance, some of the cost would be absorbed by my insurance. Then a routine colonoscopy turned up a 1cm. cancerous polyp. That meant surgery. The cost of the presurgery tests and the surgery itself, even with insurance, was expensive. I had to go on medical leave from work, so I didn't have as much money coming in. Even with the $1,000.00 my Mom and Dad gave me to help pay bills, I still had to pay for some things via credit card. The surgery went well, but the cancer had entered my lymph nodes. This meant chemotherapy. 12 cycles of chemotherapy.

  Why is it that when I see a light at the end of the tunnel it's always the headlight of an oncoming train? It seems like no matter what I do, I can't get ahead financially. I clear away most of my credit card debt and now I have health problems. End result, more damn debt. I'm due to return to work some time in December. I'll still be undergoing chemo, but I have no choice. I can't afford to take any more time off. And when those treatments are done, what will happen next to fuck me over? Another health crisis? An accident? What? It would be really nice if after all this is done, I could enjoy a period of financial stability. One where I could pay down my credit card, clear away some bills and build up my bank accounts. I'd like to be able to attend Gen Con this year. 

Ebola News Coverage

  Ebola has been figuring prominently in the news lately. You'd think, by the way it's being covered, that we're on the verge of an Ebola pandemic. I don't see this happening. From what I've read and heard about it, this disease isn't very infectious. Ebola's not like the flu. It can't be spread via sneezing or coughing. You'd pretty much have to get the bodily fluids of an infected person in your mouth or bloodstream in order to become infected yourself. The reason it's so prevalent in Africa is because far too many people are exposed to the bodily fluids of the infected that aren't taking the proper precautions.
  Here in the U.S., we've had two cases that I'm aware of, one in Dallas and one in New York. Both of these individuals have been quarantined and it's extremely unlikely that Ebola will spread beyond them. So why is there all this panic in the news? I expect this sort of thing from the Fascist Fucks at the Fox Propaganda Network. Their whole business relies on fear mongering, lies, homophobia, misogyny and race hate. Those huffers of their own fermented shit aren't interested in the facts. They just want to use anything and everything to push their right wing ideology. They have no morals, ethics or standards of decency. The other news networks, however, should know better. Politicians should know better too. Their overreaction is just as bad. They act like they're medical professionals and go around ordering people quarantined without consulting with actual medical professionals. They also make a bunch of asinine suggestions regarding how to deal with individuals coming into country from Ebola ridden areas. Stupidity like this has resulted in one nurse being confined to an unheated tent with no running water and a box for a toilet for period of time. The politicians need to leave the medical problems to those with the knowledge and training to handle them and go back to doing what they do best, licking the shit out of ass cracks of the rich in order to get that sweet, sweet campaign cash. More information on this can be found here.

You've got to be fucking kidding me

  On tonight's Daily Show, they had a spot where they talk to Rev. Bob Larson about him conducting exorcisms via Skype. Can you believe it? Can you FUCKING believe it!?! It's the 21st century and we still have people in this country that think demons and demonic possession are real. Now I've seen videos of these so called exorcisms and they consist of nothing more than people making funny faces and talking in weird voices. Nothing even remotely supernatural occurs. You'd think if the person in question were really possessed, the possessing demon would make every effort to demonstrate its power in order to intimidate the exorcist yet this never occurs. The people receiving these exorcisms are nothing more than mentally unbalanced people in need of serious therapy. These so called exorcists, by catering to their delusions, are simply acting as enablers. This is bullshit plain and simple. And Rev. Larson asks for donations of $290.00 for each exorcism. Nice scam you've got there, buddy. You delude people into thinking they're possessed and then bilk them out of $290.00 so you can "cure" them. And the law makes no effort to arrest you for being a scam artist.

The Upcoming Chemotherapy Treatment

  At some point in the not too distant future, I will be starting chemotherapy. This is because some cancer cells from the malignant polyp penetrated my intestinal wall and got into a lymph node. Even though this node, along with 19 others, was removed during the colectomy, some cancer cells may have gotten into my bloodstream or lymphatic system. This could lead to the cancer recurring at some point in the future. Chemotherapy is designed to kill fast dividing cells like cancer. Unfortunately, other fast dividing cells, like bone marrow, get killed as well.

  The drug cocktail the oncologist wants to use consists of the following three drugs, 5-Fluorouracil (5-FU), Oxaliplatin and Leucovorin. The first two drugs have a lengthy list of side effects. While I won't necessarily suffer all the listed side effects, the treatment will still wreck havoc on my system. They want me to be part of a clinical study and I've agreed. They want to see if six treatments are as effective as twelve. They also want to see if the drug celocoxib, also known as Celebrex, can prevent the formation of intestinal polyps. I'm hoping to get into one of the six treatment groups for two reasons, it'll cost me less and I'll suffer less side effects. The medical costs are racking up fast and I have yet to receive my first disability payment. While the insurance I have through work pays for most of it, what's left in a few instances has been quite substantial. My biggest worry is that at some point the insurance will stop covering the treatments and I'll be stuck with the entire bill. I'll post more as things progress.

The Results of the Biopsy

  The appointment I had with the surgeon that did my colectomy brought news of a less than rosy nature. The cancer that was in my intestines has affected one of my lymph nodes. This means that my cancer is officially at stage 3. I have an appointment with an oncologist this Wednesday to go over my treatment options. Dr. Needle said that chemotherapy is the most likely course of action. Given what I know about chemotherapy, this won't be a pleasant experience. On the plus side, I've heard that there are a variety of chemotherapy treatments out there and not all of them make you sick, kill your appetite and cause massive hair loss. I'm not looking forward to this but I have little choice. Doing nothing means the cancer will spread and I'll end up at stage 4. Stage 4 is pretty much death. I can't let that happen. The cancer can still be stopped.

Home from the Hospital

  After spending five days in the hospital, I was released this past Monday afternoon. The surgery went quite well and the healing process continues. The surgery has left 3 small incisions currently being stitched closed by a single staple each. Another incision, held closed by 3 staples, is on the lower lip of my belly button. The longest incision runs between my belly button and sternum. It's about 4 inches long and has about 16 staples closing it. The incisions are healing nicely. The bruising that surrounded them is gone. There's no pain so it's unlikely that I'm going to need to fill the prescription for Percocet I was given when I was discharged. Here's a picture of the incision.

I wonder what it's going to look like once the staples are removed. 

The Upcoming Surgery

 This is my last blog entry prior to my surgery. My right colectomy, which was originally scheduled for 1:15 pm has been moved up to 11:45 am so I'll be at the hospital at 9:45 am. I'm planning on bringing my iPad with me so I can, hopefully, post a post-op report on how things went. I REALLY want this surgery to go well and be as routine and uncomplicated as possible. For an unknown time after my surgery my bowels will be shut down so I won't be able to eat or drink anything. As soon as I am able, I'll be taking my happy ass over to Red Lobster so I can enjoy a nice Ultimate Feast platter and Cheddar Bay biscuits. After all that I'll be going through I think I deserve some good seafood. I can't say that I'm not worried despite reassurances otherwise. All the pre-op preparations are done. The necessary paperwork has been filled out and turned in. My bowels have been cleaned out and the prescribed pharmaceuticals taken. I'm going to be in the hospital for about a week and at home recovering for about three more weeks after that. How I'll spend all this free time is unknown to me.

  Update: Due to some emergency surgery, my colectomy has been moved back to 1:00 pm.

Cowardly, Chicken Shit Vigilantes

  In another article fromThe Daily Kos, a group of vigilante nut jobs, in order to keep Central American children from crossing the border, decided to try and shut down the border. This pissed off the Mexican cartels who made it clear to the vigilantes "The cartel has people at every port listed...waiting for us, so I was told." Upon this revelation, all the vigilantes, except 5, bailed out of the event. These inbred, right wing, fucking retarded gun nuts talk big when they're up against unarmed children trying to cross the border but when threatened by a group that has considerable firepower and the wherewithal to use it against them, they shit their collective pants and haul ass for home. Of course this is to be expected from a group that would use their wives and children as human shields when confronted by government forces at Cliven Bundy's ranch. These people are racist, homophobic genetic defectives that barely qualify as sentient beings. They should all get together and find a place to hole up and remove their presence from civilized Americans. They are a blight on this great nation.

Hobby Lobby Ruling Bites Us in the Ass Again

In a new article from The Daily Kos, Vergel Steed, a member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, doesn't have to comply with a federal subpoena because naming church leaders would violate his religious freedom. This is according to a Sept. 11th decision by U.S. District Court Judge David Sam. The FLDS has been under scrutiny because of alleged child labor violations and forced marriages of grown men to underage girls. So once again the Hobby Lobby ruling is biting us in the ass. The FLDS is trying to use the ruling to cover up its less than moral activities. This asinine SCOTUS ruling basically allows anyone with "deeply held" religious beliefs to thumb their nose at the law and get away with it no matter how idiotic those beliefs might be because "It is not for the Court to 'inquir[e] into the theological merit of the belief in question.'" How fucking quaint. It's my "deeply held" belief that the chronically fucking stupid right wing SCOTUS jackwads responsible for this maggot ridden piece of filth be strung up by their genitals while having every nerve excoriated. 

The NFL and Criminal Behavior

  The NFL has proven on multiple recent occasions that it doesn't give a rat's ass about child abuse, spousal abuse or any other crimes committed by its players. All it cares about is money. Money, money, money, money. Fuck everyone and everything else. It's time for the higher ups at the NFL to stop huffing their own fermented shit and clean up the league. As long as it coddles the criminals in its ranks, those players will consider themselves above the law and learn nothing. They must suffer the consequences for their actions.

Heading for Surgery

  On Sept. 25th, I'm going to have laparoscopic colorectal surgery to remove the cancerous polyp from my cecum. Despite the fact that the polyp is only approximately 1cm, about one third of my large intestine will be removed. I believe this is being done in order to prevent the cancer from spreading to my lymph nodes. There's some lab and prep work that needs to be done prior to the surgery. I also have to get in touch with Human Resources at work to secure the time off. I'm going to be in the hospital for about one week and off from work for about a month. I also need to call AIL and see if they need to get involved.

Science may have identified Jack the Ripper

  The Daily Kos has reported that Jack the Ripper's identity may now be known. Genetic material obtained from a shawl found by Catherine Eddowes' body had DNA evidence from both Eddowes and one other person. Rather than restate things, I'll post links to both articles. The articles are from The Daily Kos and The Daily Mail. If this proves to be legitimate, we'll finally have the answer to one of the greatest unsolved crimes of all time.

My Last Rant on this Subject

  My sex life is nonexistent. It is always going to be nonexistent. With that in mind, I've decided to make this my last rant on this topic. After this, I won't write about it anymore. As any regular reader here knows, women are utterly and completely disinterested in me. I am the ultimate omega male. There many reasons for this.
  1. I'm not particularly handsome. Let's face facts, I'm a dumpy, possibly balding fuck. My looks pretty much scream genetic defective.
  2. Despite a college degree, I work as a wage slave in a grocery store doing a job a retarded monkey could probably pull off. Whatever potential I had was wasted due to laziness and stupidity on my part. A B.S. in chemistry and nothing to show for it.
  3. I never left home. That's right, dear insouciant reader, yours truly still lives with his parents. If there's anything guaranteed to both turn women away and keep them away, it's this.
  4. No woman wants to deal with someone as sexually inexperienced as I am. Being a virgin at my age is proof positive of how undesirable I am to the opposite sex. Hell, I couldn't get laid at a heterosexual nymphomaniacs convention.
  5. While it might appear at times that I seem to be a happy person, deep down I'm a bitter, cynical individual that tends to regard humanity as little more than a large group of vicious animals. There are times when I sincerely believe that the only reason other people exist is so they can metaphorically shit all over me.
  6. I'm a nothing and a nobody. I'm so far beneath contempt it's a wonder the rest of humanity even bothers to acknowledge my existence.
  7. Too much fantasizing has severely skewed what I want in a potential mate. I cling to an image of a desirable woman that is unachieveable. Expecting any woman to become my perfect mate, especially given how woefully inadequate I am is the height of arrogance. I have no right to hold anyone to standards I have so miserably failed to achieve.
  Taken singly, none of these physical and character flaws would necessarily prevent me from finding that special someone. However, the whole is far, far greater than the sum of its parts. Each defect augments and magnifies the others rendering said whole wholly, completely and utterly unpalatable to the fairer sex. I'm surprised they don't become physically ill whenever I'm around.
  So ends my final rant on this matter.

Colonoscopy Update

  In my last colonoscopy post, I mistakenly stated that one of the polyps was in a precancerous state. That statement is wrong. The polyp found in my cecum is cancerous specifically an invasive moderately differentiated adenocarcinoma. As far as I know, the cancer is limited to the polyp itself. I had a CT scan this past Friday that will provide more information about the extent of the cancer. Needless to say, I'll be getting surgery to remove it some time in the future. Updates will be posted on this blog as more information comes in.

Colonoscopy: The Results Show

  Dr. Hernandez called me at work with the results of my colonoscopy. It seems that the polyp that was partially removed was in a precancerous state. Fortunately, it was discovered before it became a major issue. He recommends that I get a CAT scan and then some surgery to remove what's left of it. He'll most likely called sometime in the near future to make the appointment.

Colonoscopy

  This past Monday I had my first colonoscopy. Yup, I had a camera up my ass. Overall, the process wasn't that bad. Whatever sedative they gave me zonked me out to the point where I have no memory at all of the procedure. I remember being wheeled into the room where it was going to take place. Then they attached various monitoring devices and administered the sedative. After that, nothing until I was in the recovery room. Two polyps were found. One was completely removed. The other was partially removed. The results are expected to come in the mail in about 10 days. The least pleasant part of the whole thing was drinking the MoviPrep. Despite smelling somewhat like citrus, its taste left much to be desired. I had to drink two batches of this stuff at 3:00 and 7:00pm this past Sunday. Each batch was drunk in four stages over the hour in question. Then I spent all kinds of time running to the bathroom in order to clear out my bowels. In all likelihood, I'll have to repeat this process in about 3 months in order to deal with what remains of the one polyp.

The Hobby Lobby Ruling: The Satanic Response

   Remember when SCOTUS ruled that corporations with "closely held" religious beliefs had the same First Amendment religious protection as human beings? The Christian Right wanted this ruling as yet another way to impose their religion upon everyone else. Other people wondered what would happen if non Christians tried to use this ruling. In an article from the Daily Kos, the Satanic Temple is trying to do just that. Their claim is that this ruling exempts its believers from state-mandated informed consent laws that require women considering abortions to read pro-life material. Information regarding the Temple's efforts can be found here. I love it. I want to see how the right wing religious pricks are going to respond to this. I'm certain they'll be frothing at the mouth at the Temple's temerity. How dare they exploit a ruling that was only supposed to benefit Christians! I want to hear how the propaganda monkeys over at Fox are going to handle it. Those verbal diarrhea spewing, hate mongering jack holes must be going apoplectic over this. Of all the world's religions, Satanism is the only one that makes any sense. They are little different from atheists like me. They don't believe in God anymore than I do. You can learn more about LaVeyan Satanism here.

My Solution to the Gun Problem.

  For some time now, there has been much debate over how to lower the level of gun violence in America. I have a solution that might work. It's not perfect, but I think it has promise. First off, anyone that wants a gun should be allowed to purchase one. There will be no background checks because we all know that the NRA is completely against them probably because its membership is completely paranoid. Ok, now the Second Amendment is properly protected. Now lest you think that this will result in more gun violence, there's a caveat. The sentence for anyone found guilty of committing a crime involving a firearm is death. Period. End of sentence. In order to keep the accused from tying up the legal system, they are only allowed one appeal. No more. If that appeal fails to reverse the guilty verdict, the guilty party is executed. This execution doesn't take place days, weeks, months or years after the failed appeal. The guilty party is immediately taken to the execution chamber and the sentence is carried out. I know that some people say that the death penalty doesn't keep others from committing the crime in question. I don't know how true that is. My goal isn't necessarily to get others to stop gun violence. My goal is to remove the irresponsible gun toting cocksuckers from the land of the living. The more violent, gun toting thugs killed, the fewer there are to menace society at large.'Nuff said!

Pretty People, Rich People

  Pretty people have a decided advantage over those of us of ordinary appearance. Take the case of Jeremy Meeks, the so called "Hot Convict". Hundreds of thousands of people pleaded for mercy for him solely because he's good looking. He's signed with two Hollywood agents that want to capitalize on his looks. Does anyone reading this think there'd be all this fuss over him if he were average or homely looking? The answer is, of course, "Fuck no!!". This guy wouldn't rate even the most meager amount of attention if he weren't good looking. Let's face facts. Women want mercy for him because, deep down inside, they want to fuck him. It's evolution. People instinctively seek out the most genetically desirable mate. So physically attractive people tend to get treated better than the rest of us. Rich people, on the other hand, simply get what they want by buying it. Things like cars, boats, politicians. The government rolls over backwards to accommodate them. The current Supreme Court's ruling that money is speech and the ending of contribution limits means that the rich will control what the rest of us see and hear when the campaign for the Presidency begins in earnest. As long as the rich have this kind of power, the rest of us are screwed.

The Good & The Bad

  It's been a mixed bag in my life lately. On the down side, I was recently found out that I have type 2 diabetes. Not a big surprise given that I'm overweight and drink soda like it's going out of style. It wasn't a question of will I get it but when will I get it. Apparently my diabetes isn't severe enough to require me to take insulin. I've been prescribed the drug metformin to lower my blood sugar levels. I'm going to have to cut down on the soda drinking and possibly modify my diet as well.
  On the plus side, my final payment to Discover card has been posted. The second major source of debt has been eliminated. The GE Money account I have through Pearle Vision is the next to go given that it's fairly low and I have more money to spare. All that will be left then is the Springleaf account. As a reward, I ordered a new zentai for myself. The pattern sort of looks like molten rock. I plan to get a credit card through Educator's Credit Union to replace the defunct cards I paid off. Next year, I will be going back to Gen Con. I haven't been there since 2009.

SCOTUS has fucked it up again

  First, the Supreme Court declared corporations to be people. Then they declared money to be speech. Now they're giving some of these corporations, like Hobby Lobby, the right to ram the owners' religious beliefs down the throats of their employees. The five cocksucking vermin on the Supreme Court that granted this right to the hypocritical, religious zealot, fascist owners of Hobby Lobby are clearly owned by the corporations and gleefully cater to their whims. The owners of Hobby Lobby aren't looking for religious freedom. They want power pure and simple. Check out this article on Daily Kos. Other articles regarding the idiocy of the religious right, SCOTUS, and Hobby Lobby can be found here.

Things I Thought I'd Never See

  The Daily Kos recently posted a few things I thought would never see the light of day. First off, we have one of the Fox News Network's resident propaganda monkeys, Megyn Kelly, actually ripping into former Vice President Dick Cheney regarding Iraq. That clip can be found here. The second involves former Fox News commentator Glenn Beck and televangelist Pat Robertson admitting that liberals were right when they spoke out against invading Iraq. That article can be found here. I thought I'd heard everything when Rev. Robertson came out in favor of making marijuana possession legal. You can find that article here.  It just goes to show that sometimes truly weird shit can actually happen.

Retarded Texas Republicans

  Texas Republicans are proving to the world that they are mentally, spiritually and morally retarded when compared to everyone else. They're advocating a vicious form of pseudoscience called conversion or reparative therapy. This "therapy" is supposed to turn homosexuals into heterosexuals. According to Wikipedia, "Psychologist Douglas Haldeman writes that conversion therapy comprises efforts by mental health professionals and pastoral care providers to convert lesbians and gay men to heterosexuality by techniques including aversive treatments, such as "the application of electric shock to the hands and/or genitals," and "nausea-inducing drugs...administered simultaneously with the presentation of homoerotic stimuli," masturbatory reconditioning, visualization, social skills training, psychoanalytic therapy, and spiritual interventions, such as "prayer and group support and pressure."^{[10]" The Republican Party of Texas, along with Christian Fundamentalists, are proving that religious bigotry is alive and well here in America. While the rest of the country strides into the 21st century, these stultifyingly stupid inbred jack offs are thoroughly mired in the past. Leading the charge for these mental defectives is none other than Rick Perry, Governor of Texas. Check out this article where he compares homosexuality to alcoholism. Anyone that supports someone this chronically fucking stupid clearly is WAY too stupid to be allowed to vote and should be denied said right until their intellectual capacity rises above that of the clinically brain dead.}

Chronically Fucking Stupid People

  There are far too many people that suffer from chronic fucking stupidity. These people persist in believing utter nonsense despite overwhelming scientific data. The two major groups afflicted with C.F.S. are climate change deniers and the whack jobs that refuse to get their kids vaccinated. These fucking moronic dwellers in the shallow end of the gene pool let no amount of legitimate scientific evidence get in the way of them googling misinformation from the internet and then acting like they know everything on the subject in question. I'm here to tell you that you're not experts on these subjects. Please step away from your computers and leave the gathering of scientific data to people that actually understand the science in question. You clearly are far too stupid to understand what you're doing. Stop. Now. I implore you. You've done far too much damage to us as a species. Anyone suffering from these high levels of chronic, willful ignorance and stupidity need to be culled away from the rest of us and killed lest the rest of us get infected with their mental disorder. It's the only way that we as a species can continue to evolve.

Asocial Personality Disorder

  I've never been a very sociable person. I tend to keep to myself most of the time. People tend to get somewhat weirded out on those rare occasions when I get talkative. I don't associate much with my fellow coworkers. I don't like being at social gatherings where I don't know anyone because I have a hard time talking to people I don't know. Being a random person at a rock concert is fine because everyone's attention is focused on the stage. This lack of sociability is the main reason I make no attempts at dating. Dating involves putting yourself out there and essentially advertising yourself. This works fine if you have something worth advertising. I have nothing worth advertising. I'm not a happy person by nature. I pride myself on being a cynical fuck that sees humans as the often vicious animals we are. I keep a lot of hate and anger inside me. This hate and anger gets evenly split. Half of it I turn on myself. The other half gets spewed at whatever's pissing me off at the moment. I regard this as a fair split since I'm responsible for most of the shit that fucks with my life here on this miserable little turd ball of a planet. This anger and hate is always just below the surface. It seeps out in small ways whenever I feel like people or events are deliberately fucking with me. My body language and attitude convey a subtle 'I have no desire to suffer your presence. Please fuck off and die.' message that drives people away. When you're like this most of the time, people avoid talking to you. Despite my desire to find some female companionship, I genuinely feel that it's best that I remain alone. With the exception of the times I've spent with my few close friends, being alone is usually when I'm happiest. I'm just not good around people.

Another P.T.T. Moment Revised

  While being a complete and utter nobody that no woman would ever want to fuck has its disadvantages, there are some positive aspects to it.
  1. I have virtually no chance of contracting an STD. Hell, the only way I could get AIDS is from contaminated blood.
  2. I'll never have to deal with alimony, palimony or prenups.
  3. No unwanted pregnancies.
  4. Any genetic defects present in my DNA die with me.
  5. I'm not contributing to the overpopulation of the world.
  6. I'll never have to worry about being stalked by a crazy ex-lover.
  7. No marriage means no divorce.
  8. I get to fuck both Valentine's Day and Sweetest Day in the ass with a razor wire dildo.
  9. If I suffer from erectile dysfunction at some point in the future, it won't be that big a deal. I have yet to have sex with a woman. It's unlikely that I ever will have sex with a woman. Where's the loss? I'd go from having virtually no sex life to having no sex life. Things would hardly change.
  10. I'll never have to worry about my ability to please a woman sexually because no woman will ever want to have sex with me. Think of all the stress I'll be avoiding as a result.
  11. I'll also be saving money because I'll never have to go through any dating or courting rituals trying to win over a woman that finds me repugnant. They don't want to deal with me. I stay away from them. It's a win-win all around.
  12. I'll never have to deal with the scrutiny of  any woman's friends or relatives regarding my status as a potential mate. More stress relief.
  13. Since I've never had sex, I don't know what it's like. And you can't really miss something you've never had. As the saying goes, "Ignorance is bliss.". If that's the case, then as far as sex goes, I'm one blissed out motherfucker.
  14. I never have to deal with a jealous mate. I can look at all the women I want and collect fetish photos and DVDs with impunity.
  15. I never have to worry about my girlfriend cheating on me because, let's face it, no woman is ever going to want that position. I'm going to be alone my whole fucking life.
  16. According to a recent newspaper article, it costs about $280,000.00 to raise a child today. Since the likelihood of me ever becoming a father is pretty much nonexistent, I'll never have to bear this cost. That means more money for me. If I play my cards right maybe I can use said saving to pay for a trip to Australia. I've always wanted to go there.
  17. Treating erectile disfunction costs money. But since the odds of my having sex is zero, I don't need to spend the money. More savings for me.
  I'm sure there are other positive aspects to being a worthless, miserable nonentity like me. If I think of any more, I'll edit them into this blog post. This has been another Polishing the Turd moment brought to you by the Fellowship of The Eternal Dobbs Pipe. May the Luck Plane align in your favor.

One Hate-Mongering Bigot Down...

  The rest of the Westboro Baptists to go. The poster boy for hate-mongering religious bigotry, Fred Phelps, is dead. With the passing of this hemorrhoid in his fictional God's ass crack, the quality of life on this planet has increased immensely. Now if the rest of his inbred clan of shit spewing suckers of syphilitic goat cum would do everyone a favor and commit mass suicide, cultural diversity and tolerance could really make some great strides. 'Nuff said!

Who's Reading this Blog?

  At this point in time, I've had 4,492 pageviews of my blog. However, since I started writing this blog, not one person has left a comment here or become a follower. I find it a bit unusual that no one out there has an opinion on any of the things I've ranted about. I'd have thought by now that at least one person would have spoken up even if it was just to tell me to go fuck myself. I don't know if the lack of comments is a good thing or a bad thing. I would like some idea as to the type of people that are reading my blog posts. Who are you? Drop me a line and let me know. I don't expect everyone to agree with my views and I know I must have pissed off a few people by now. A little feedback wouldn't hurt. Once again, this is the Right Rev. Mike, founder and sole member of the Fellowship of The Eternal Dobbs Pipe signing off.

The Soulmate Myth

  Some people believe that everyone in the world has a soulmate. That special someone that's ideally suited to them and is their perfect mate. This is complete and utter fucking bullshit. This is a myth perpetuated by dating sights and services in order to get your money. Don't get me wrong, some people do find that special someone and have truly happy and fulfilled lives with them. But to believe that EVERYONE has a soulmate is mind numbingly naive. The only guarantee in life is that you'll eventually die. Most people never find that special someone. They end up simply finding someone that they can tolerate and that will tolerate them and go on to have a fairly mediocre existence. Others, like me, just give up altogether and stop searching. What's the point? What is the motherfucking point? Why should I engage in a completely pointless and futile act that will only end in failure? If there was a point in my life when I was at my peak, it's long since past. Even at this so called peak I wasn't much. Now that I'm in the inexorable slide towards death, it doesn't make much sense to waste my remaining time here hoping to find some woman interested in spending time with me. If I'm pretty much going to be alone for the rest of my life, then so be it. Like I said before, I've done plenty of things alone.

More Shit Spewing from Conservatives: Updated

  During the Super Bowl, Coca Cola aired a commercial of people singing America the Beautiful with some of the lyrics being sung in foreign languages. Naturally, this upset some dumbass, racist, homophobic jerk off motherfucking conservatives like Rush Limbaugh. How dare Coca Cola preach unity and tolerance! That goes against everything these conservative dick breaths stand for. They forget the fact that America is a nation composed almost entirely of immigrants. One of the sayings of this country is "E Pluribus Unum" (Out of many, one.). This article sums up some of the reasons why these assholes have their collective bowels in an uproar. After you've read that article, check out this brilliant response by anchorwoman Brenda Wood.

More Religious Stupidity

    Today's Journal Times featured an article about Dale and Leilani Neumann of Weston. They were convicted in 2009 of second degree reckless homicide in the death of their 11 year old daughter, Madeline Kara. She died in 2008 from a treatable form of diabetes because her fucking stupid religious zealot parents prayed instead of getting her medical help. These negligent, ignorant superstitionists allowed this poor girl to grow weaker and weaker for several weeks until she became too sick to speak, eat, drink or walk. They ignored suggestions from the girl's grandmother to take her to a doctor. They put their religious beliefs ahead of their daughter's well being and she pays the price. If your precious beliefs prevent you from going to the hospital, that's your business. In all honesty, I hope whatever condition you're not getting treatment for kills you. The world will be better off without you. However, your religious views should not allow you to endanger others. Dale and Leilani have proven beyond all doubt that they're incompetent at raising children. Their remaining children should be permanently taken away from them and they should be locked away where they can do no further harm. That is the sanest course of action to take.

Performance Enhancing Drugs

  The moronic jackasses at Fox News have stated that baseball players should be allowed to use performance enhancing drugs and for once, I agree with them. Let them take all the p.e.d.s they want. In fact, they should make it mandatory in all sports. After all, they're paid enormous salaries to play and we should get our fucking money's worth. Especially given the amount of money we have to pay to attend these sporting events. So juice them up with steroids, growth hormones and whatever else is out there and damn the consequences! They clearly have no qualms about using them. They make more than enough money to purchase the best health insurance plans available. Sure they'd be high risk because of all the damage the drugs will do to their bodies, but so what? And if they develop roid rage, we put them down like the vicious animals they've become.

We Are Information

  Information has become the new currency of the 21st century. It seems like everyone is champing at the proverbial bit to gather intel on people. I just read an article about a company that uses sensors to track the movements of GPS enabled smartphones in order to gather information about the habits of the smartphones' owners. The collectors of said data process it and sell it to their clients so they can better sell their products and services. As this technology becomes more ubiquitous, the amount of data gathered about our movements and habits will grow exponentially. The question is how much privacy will we lose as a result of this technology? Big Brother already exists to some degree in our society. However, unlike in Orwell's fictional Oceania, this Big Brother hides in plain sight. Instead of Thought Police, we have Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and the like. And we voluntarily supply information about ourselves to these sights. Couple that with the information surreptitiously gathered via our smartphones, computers and tablets and the amount of information about us that exists on the Web is probably staggering. Data mining has become very lucrative for some companies and unlike precious metals, it won't run dry. This is a double edged sword we're wielding. In the wrong hands, we could end up prisoners in an information driven techno-dictatorship where our movements and information are constantly tracked and collated in order to keep us in line.

Russia's Stand on Homosexuality

  The Russian government has made it clear that it won't tolerate any pro LGBT demonstrations during the upcoming Winter Olympics. I say there should be all kinds of pro LGBT demonstrations at the Winter Olympics. Peaceful demonstrations only though. There should be pro LGBT symbols displayed everywhere. If Putin doesn't like it, he can shove it up his ass sideways with a dead cat. This fucking old school commie is going to have a hard time quelling protests with the whole world watching. Putin does have his supporters though. That old right wing religious zealot Pat Buchanan has been singing Putin's praises lately. This mentally defective product of an archaic and obsolete mindset has no place in a modern enlightened society. I get so tired of conservatives talking about constitutional rights when they're so intent on denying those rights to groups they don't care for.

God Loves Uganda

  The title of this blog post refers to a documentary about Evangelicals proselytizing against homosexuality in Uganda. These motherfucking hypocritical religious bigots have the unmitigated gall to support Uganda's law making homosexuality punishable by death. They talk about how Christians are being persecuted in other countries like North Korea yet think nothing of persecuting others. And they do this in the name of their nonexistent God. When are people going to realize that religion is nothing more than superstitious bullshit? Religion encourages people to stop thinking and swallow ludicrous idiocy as though it were unimpeachable truth. Religion is irrational, illogical and insane. I will be so happy to see it come to an end.

Journal Times Article

  The Racine Journal Times ran an article asking readers to answer five questions regarding their hobby. I responded to their query and they ran the article on New Year's Day. The photograph below was taken by Scott Anderson, a photographer from the Journal Times of me and my Great Cthulhu Horror Clix miniature.