Pseudo Religions? Part 2 and Other News

  I've discovered that there's a First United Church of Cthulhu and you can download their Certificate of Ordination here. Needless to say, I want to get ordained. I've downloaded the certificate. Now I just have to get it filled out and printed.
  I'm still waiting for some of my Kickstarter rewards to arrive. The Judge Dredd rewards are being mailed out now. Randice production started around March 6th so hopefully they'll be mailing out those soon. The Tower of Holding rewards fulfillment has run into some problems but those problems  are being sorted out. The blanks for the Bonus Tracking Dice arrived March 9th and final tests and production set to begin next week. The Dice Coins survey has been filled out and returned. I found out that as an early backer, I was entitled to two more Dice Coins so I'm getting 12 Dice Coins in all plus 3 pouches.
  The money for the Immersive Battle Maps should be transferred to Kickstarter soon. I don't know when the surveys will be sent out. The Debunked card game, Cthulhu Coins and the One Fuck/Zero Fucks Decision Maker Coin Kickstarters still have either 8 or 11 days to go. The Cultist coin has been unlocked and I've upped my pledge in order to get it. I'm also getting two free pouches with the coins. If the total reaches $45,000 or more, the Elder Sign pin gets unlocked.

Sanctimonious Child Rapists

  Once again, the Catholic Church is embroiled in a sex abuse scandal. This time it's happening in Pennsylvania. It seems these sanctimonious pedophiles have been at it for quite some time. The events in Pennsylvania have led to New York and New Jersey investigating their dioceses for possible sex abuse. Add to this the sexual abuse scandals in Ireland and other countries and the scandal is pretty much worldwide. And to rub more salt into the wound, the Church has made it their business to cover up the crimes of their child raping brethren rather than protect the children. They're even fighting a bill that would extend the Statute of Limitations in regards to child abuse cases.
  I'm so tired of these pious motherfuckers and their two faced bullshit. These pricks rail against consensual homosexual relationships as being sinful and against God's will while they're molesting and raping children and covering it up. They look down their collective noses at the rest of us and have the temerity to think they have the right to judge us. They can't take the moral high ground anymore. It seems to me that the Church is in need of a serious beat-down.
  First and foremost, there should be no statute of limitations in regards to crimes like pedophilia, child molestation and rape. The fact that some of the accused priests can no longer be prosecuted because of it pisses me off to no end. Second, any priests convicted of these crimes or of covering them up, need to thrown out of the Church and into prison. Third, Church property needs to be seized and sold at auction with the proceeds going to SNAP. And fourth, people need to stop donating to the Church. Who knows how much of their donations have gone into protecting the child molesters in their ranks? There are plenty of worthy charities to give your money. Don't give it to these malignant perverts.
  Personally, I'd like to see these fuckers get what they really deserve, a massive ass raping. Here's how it would work. You lock up those individuals convicted of these crimes or of covering them up. A timer that they can't see randomly determines a time from 10 minutes to 24 hours. When said timer goes off, the prisoner is locked into a machine that fucks him in the ass for a random period of time. Once the machine is finished, they will be taken back to their cells and the timer reset. The fact that they'll never know how long it will be between ass rapings will add nice bit of psychological torment to the proceedings. I had considered having them get ass raped by a Coke bottle like the Khmer Rouge did to prisoners. It would have added the additional psychological effect that once their sentence was over and they were free, they would be reminded of what they went through every time they saw a Coke display. But I like Coke and wouldn't want them associated with ass raping.
  I'm going to end this post with a couple of YouTube videos regarding these events. The first one details what is currently know about the case and the other is of right wing homophobe and Church defender, Bill Donohue, blaming gays for the sex abuse scandal.

Fucked Up Design

  When a product has a flaw in it that causes injuries and/or death, it's the fault of the manufacturer not the product. Examples include the Samsung Galaxy Note 7, Takata airbags, hoverboards and General Motors ignition switches. In each case, the company that designed and manufactured the product was to blame.
  Let's apply this to Intelligent Design. Some people would have us believe that the universe was designed by an omnipotent, omniscient deity. First, God designed the angels. Everything the Angels are was brought into being by God. One of God's angelic creations, Lucifer, rebelled against God and convinced one third of the Angels to join him. Does this sound like an intelligent design to you? Sounds more like a colossal fuckup to me. And how does Mr. Omnipotence and Omniscience fix this problem? Does He out debate Lucifer and convince him and the rebelling Angels that their plan won't work? You'd think an omniscience being could pull that off with ease. Does He simply eliminate the problem by fixing the flaw in the rebellious Angels? No in both cases. This supposedly perfect being just casts Lucifer and his followers into Hell and let's the problem fester. Smart move.
  Then there's the creation of Man. Again, you'd think a supposedly perfect being would be able a design a flawless creation. Nope. Mankind is a lot of things but perfect isn't one of them. For all the good we're capable of doing, we're also capable of considerable amounts of evil. All of it designed into us by God if you believe religion. And in typical narcissistic fashion, God blames His creations for their actions rather than Himself for making those actions possible. He can't accept the fact that He's a colossal Fuckup.

Christians & Abortion: More Pious Hypocrisy

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The Meaninglessness of Life

  Life, in and of itself, is inherently meaningless. It doesn't serve some divine purpose anymore than we as a species serve a divine purpose. Claiming that life or humanity has meaning or purpose is simply a form of self aggrandizement. We do it to make ourselves feel special and important. Religion, for all its talk about being humble, engages in this sort of aggrandizement. It tells us that we were made in God's image. It tells us that we were given dominion over the Earth and its creatures by said God. It tells its believers that they're better than the nonbelievers. Instead of humility, it gives its followers hubris.

  Like it or not, we're nothing more than animals. Highly evolved animals, but animals nonetheless. And like our less evolved brethren, we can be vicious. Unlike our less evolved brethren however, we possess the intellect and skill to do some incredibly large scale damage. We have the potential to wipe out ourselves and the majority of life on the planet. And the hubris of religion can be one of the factors leading to us wiping ourselves off the face of the planet.

#ChristianPrivilege

  The strongly right wing Tea Party fucktard segment of Christianity is getting their bowels in an uproar again. First it was the antics of Bible bigot, Kim Davis, who decided to force her religious beliefs off on everyone else by refusing to do her job and grant marriage licenses to same sex couples. Now we have the much ado about nothing uproar over Starbucks plain red holiday cup that's been initiated by con man and syphilitic brain tumor, Joshua Feuerstein. This living abortion is stirring up controversy for the sole purpose of getting the stupid, ignorant and brain dead right wing Christian religious zealots to send him money. The worst part is he'll probably get it. As the linked article states, Capt. Fuckwad here begged his followers for $20,000 in order to buy a new camera that he absolutely needed. He never bought said camera but, as you can see by the photos, he bought a lot of nice things for himself. Naturally, the fascist fucks at Fox News jumped on this story as proof that the War on Christmas is real and all those nasty secularists, humanists, atheists, Democrats and other elements of the Great Left Wing Conspiracy are trying to ruin it for them.
  The right wing Christian fucktard movement wants their privileges back. They want to be able to ram their religious views down everyone else's throats. They want the right to discriminate against anyone the Bible says they should hate. They want to plaster their religious symbols all over government buildings and land while denying other religions that same privilege. They pretty much want to do away with the Establishment Clause of the Constitution and turn the United States into a Christian theocracy.
  Update: Joshua Feuerstein uploaded a video, which has since been removed, urging his followers to use violence against Planned Parenthood doctors and staff. This fucker needs to be in prison.

Eric Hovind: Creationist Asswipe

Eric Hovind, stated that if evolution is true, then it wasn't wrong for Josh Duggar to molest his sisters.  Apparently he feels that without some absolute authority figure holding the threat of eternal damnation over our heads, mankind would act in a completely amoral and sociopathic manner. Think about that for a moment. Hovind truly believes that we're utterly incapable of acting in a moral and ethical manner on our own. He's also saying in no uncertain terms that God is a fuck up. God, a supposedly omnipotent and omniscient being, either couldn't or wouldn't give mankind the ability to act compassionately. He's saying that the only reason Christians act compassionately is because they're afraid of ending up in Hell if they don't. The funny thing is, mankind has been acting morally and ethically long before God and Christianity came along. We realized long ago that it was in our best interest as a species to act in a manner that benefitted us as a whole. That why we created a system of laws to govern ourselves. We're not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but we are capable of governing ourselves without having to create some divine mythical authority figure to stand in ultimate judgment of us.

The End of the World is nigh: Religious Fuckwads Rejoice!

  According to Michele Bachmann, the End of the World is nigh and all good Christians should rejoice! This poster child for mandatory lobotomies for the terminally stupid thinks that Pres. Obama's policies, gay rights and Iran possibly getting nuclear weapons is a sign that the End Times are coming soon. To make matters worse, there are a lot of people, primarily Tea Partiers, that listen to the vacuous babbling of Our Lady of the Empty Skull and believe every word of it. These insane religious fuckwads actually want all sorts of misery, pain and suffering to be inflicted on mankind because they believe they'll be magically Raptured up to Heaven before the shit hits the fan. What really worries me is that the more demented of these fuckwads might try to actively bring about the events the Bible says proceed the Rapture in order to speed the process. Won't that be loads of fun? I got news for them, if the shit does hit the fan like they want it to, they're going to be very disappointed when they find out they're not going to Heaven. They're going to be stuck here with the rest of us.

Islam: Religion of Peace?

  In Kabul, Afghanistan, a woman named Farkhunda was beaten to death when a peddler in Kabul's Shah-Do Shamshira mosque accused her of burning a Quran when the two of them had an argument because he was selling amulets to childless women. Details as to what the mob did to her are in this Journal Times article. No evidence was ever put forth that she had burned a Quran. She was not arrested, tried and found guilty of burning a Quran. The mob simply beat her to death based on what the peddler said. The police officers present at the time either ignored the situation or took an active part in her death. Muslims say that Islam is a religion of peace. How can they say that when incidences like this occur? This is what I truly hate about religion. A crowd of people went homicidal because they thought someone had burned a copy of their holy book. I don't care what you think about the Quran, it's just a fucking book. Millions of copies of it exist and millions of copies have likely been destroyed in various manners. And the Quran, like every other "holy" book written before or since, was written by man. Not God, man. And because man wrote it, it contains not only man's wisdom but also man's hatred and prejudices as well. We're flawed therefore our "holy" books are flawed as well. We, as a species, have a nasty tendency to elevate things and regard them as being above question or reproach. Religion is one of those things. Some people believe that no one is allowed to criticize, question or insult it. This is complete and utter fucking bullshit. Religion isn't holy. It's merely a bunch of superstitions that WAY too many people believe to be true. We, as a species, need to stop drinking the poisoned Kool Aid of religious belief and start letting reason and logic enlighten us instead.

Religious Freedom Acts

  Gov. Pence stirred up quite a hornet's nest of protest when he signed SB 101, the Religious Freedom Restoration Act into law. Despite what he said, this law was nothing more than a blatant attempt to give right wing Christian bigots the freedom to discriminate against LGBT people on religious grounds without having to worry about being sued. The Christian bigot portion of this country is constantly looking for ways to lord it over the rest of us and they get real whiny when they don't get their way.

  Gov. Pence initially supported the bill and said that its detractors simply didn't understand the bill's intended purpose. It should be noted, however, that Memories Pizza announced that if they were asked to cater to a gay wedding, they would refuse. Follow the link for more information on that. This is exactly what Gov. Pence said wouldn't happen when SB 101 became law.
  The backlash was swift and brutal. The NCAA announced that it would no longer hold any March Madness tournaments there if the law isn't amended or repealed. Angie's List, which is based in Indiana, has held off a planned expansion of their business there because of this bill. Gen Con, one of the largest gaming conventions going, made it clear that they will take their business elsewhere if they feel that some of their attendees will be discriminated against because of this law. Even the Disciples of Christ have made it that they will move their convention because of SB 101. So many businesses and organizations have weighed in on the matter that Gov. Pence had no choice but to add a clarification to the bill stating that businesses could not use it to discriminate against LGBT people. It should be noted that although the bill has been amended, parts of Indiana still allow people to be fired because they're gay so there's still work to be done here.

You've got to be fucking kidding me

  On tonight's Daily Show, they had a spot where they talk to Rev. Bob Larson about him conducting exorcisms via Skype. Can you believe it? Can you FUCKING believe it!?! It's the 21st century and we still have people in this country that think demons and demonic possession are real. Now I've seen videos of these so called exorcisms and they consist of nothing more than people making funny faces and talking in weird voices. Nothing even remotely supernatural occurs. You'd think if the person in question were really possessed, the possessing demon would make every effort to demonstrate its power in order to intimidate the exorcist yet this never occurs. The people receiving these exorcisms are nothing more than mentally unbalanced people in need of serious therapy. These so called exorcists, by catering to their delusions, are simply acting as enablers. This is bullshit plain and simple. And Rev. Larson asks for donations of $290.00 for each exorcism. Nice scam you've got there, buddy. You delude people into thinking they're possessed and then bilk them out of $290.00 so you can "cure" them. And the law makes no effort to arrest you for being a scam artist.

Hobby Lobby Ruling Bites Us in the Ass Again

In a new article from The Daily Kos, Vergel Steed, a member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, doesn't have to comply with a federal subpoena because naming church leaders would violate his religious freedom. This is according to a Sept. 11th decision by U.S. District Court Judge David Sam. The FLDS has been under scrutiny because of alleged child labor violations and forced marriages of grown men to underage girls. So once again the Hobby Lobby ruling is biting us in the ass. The FLDS is trying to use the ruling to cover up its less than moral activities. This asinine SCOTUS ruling basically allows anyone with "deeply held" religious beliefs to thumb their nose at the law and get away with it no matter how idiotic those beliefs might be because "It is not for the Court to 'inquir[e] into the theological merit of the belief in question.'" How fucking quaint. It's my "deeply held" belief that the chronically fucking stupid right wing SCOTUS jackwads responsible for this maggot ridden piece of filth be strung up by their genitals while having every nerve excoriated. 

The Hobby Lobby Ruling: The Satanic Response

   Remember when SCOTUS ruled that corporations with "closely held" religious beliefs had the same First Amendment religious protection as human beings? The Christian Right wanted this ruling as yet another way to impose their religion upon everyone else. Other people wondered what would happen if non Christians tried to use this ruling. In an article from the Daily Kos, the Satanic Temple is trying to do just that. Their claim is that this ruling exempts its believers from state-mandated informed consent laws that require women considering abortions to read pro-life material. Information regarding the Temple's efforts can be found here. I love it. I want to see how the right wing religious pricks are going to respond to this. I'm certain they'll be frothing at the mouth at the Temple's temerity. How dare they exploit a ruling that was only supposed to benefit Christians! I want to hear how the propaganda monkeys over at Fox are going to handle it. Those verbal diarrhea spewing, hate mongering jack holes must be going apoplectic over this. Of all the world's religions, Satanism is the only one that makes any sense. They are little different from atheists like me. They don't believe in God anymore than I do. You can learn more about LaVeyan Satanism here.

One Hate-Mongering Bigot Down...

  The rest of the Westboro Baptists to go. The poster boy for hate-mongering religious bigotry, Fred Phelps, is dead. With the passing of this hemorrhoid in his fictional God's ass crack, the quality of life on this planet has increased immensely. Now if the rest of his inbred clan of shit spewing suckers of syphilitic goat cum would do everyone a favor and commit mass suicide, cultural diversity and tolerance could really make some great strides. 'Nuff said!

More Religious Stupidity

    Today's Journal Times featured an article about Dale and Leilani Neumann of Weston. They were convicted in 2009 of second degree reckless homicide in the death of their 11 year old daughter, Madeline Kara. She died in 2008 from a treatable form of diabetes because her fucking stupid religious zealot parents prayed instead of getting her medical help. These negligent, ignorant superstitionists allowed this poor girl to grow weaker and weaker for several weeks until she became too sick to speak, eat, drink or walk. They ignored suggestions from the girl's grandmother to take her to a doctor. They put their religious beliefs ahead of their daughter's well being and she pays the price. If your precious beliefs prevent you from going to the hospital, that's your business. In all honesty, I hope whatever condition you're not getting treatment for kills you. The world will be better off without you. However, your religious views should not allow you to endanger others. Dale and Leilani have proven beyond all doubt that they're incompetent at raising children. Their remaining children should be permanently taken away from them and they should be locked away where they can do no further harm. That is the sanest course of action to take.

God Loves Uganda

  The title of this blog post refers to a documentary about Evangelicals proselytizing against homosexuality in Uganda. These motherfucking hypocritical religious bigots have the unmitigated gall to support Uganda's law making homosexuality punishable by death. They talk about how Christians are being persecuted in other countries like North Korea yet think nothing of persecuting others. And they do this in the name of their nonexistent God. When are people going to realize that religion is nothing more than superstitious bullshit? Religion encourages people to stop thinking and swallow ludicrous idiocy as though it were unimpeachable truth. Religion is irrational, illogical and insane. I will be so happy to see it come to an end.

War on Christmas Redux pt. 2: Elitist Christian Zealot Assholes

  An article in Happenings magazine tells of a Phoenix Salvation Army bell ringer being assaulted by a woman outside of a Walmart because she said "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas". Can you believe the unmitigated gall of this elitist Christian cunt? Every year at this time, the fascists fucks at Fox News whine about people not kissing their religion's ass, with tongue, because they say "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas". They act like saying "Happy Holidays" to them is the equivalent of skull fucking the baby Jesus in front of a bunch of preschoolers. These people, who rant and rave that Muslims are trying to impose Sharia law upon everyone, think nothing of imposing their religious views on everyone. They really need to get over themselves and realize they're not the center of the universe.

The War on Christmas Redux

  Every year during the Christmas season we get people like Bill O'Reilly, Sarah Palin and Fox News in general whining about how the big bad secularists aren't letting Christians plant nativity scenes all over public land. I'm tired of Christians whining that they're not allowed to ram their beliefs down everyone else's throats in violation of the Establishment Clause. Let me make this clear for the Christian apologists out there. THE GOVERNMENT MUST REMAIN NEUTRAL IN REGARDS TO RELIGION!!! It can't favor one religion over the others or favor atheism over religion (or religion over atheism). It's the Establishment Clause that allows U.S. citizens to worship as they see fit. Stop wiping your collective asses with the Constitution every time it inconveniences you, you fucking moronic elitist assholes!! This country belongs to all of us, not just you!!

Happy X-Day

Today is X-Day, the day when all SubGenii hope that the Rupture will occur. If everything works out according to "Bob's" plan, the saucers of the Sex Goddesses will arrive and all dues paying SubGenii will taken off this insignificant little dirtball and the Pinks, Glorps and Mediocretins will suffer the wrath of the Xists. If things don't work out, I'll be heading off to work, ekeing out my Slackless life as a wage slave to the Conspiracy. Whether via the Rupture or via death, at some point in time, I'll be delivered from this world and taken to the Final Punchline. Praise "Bob"!! Hail Connie!! Beware the Grin of NHGH!! Rev. Mike, SubGenius preacher, Jedi minister, Discordian and Pastafarian. Leader and sole member of the Fellowship of The Eternal Dobbs Pipe clench

Westboro Baptists

The Westboro Baptists are a group of hate mongering, inbred religious zealots led by Fred Phelps. These suckers of their nonexistent God's cock run around from place to place railing against homosexuals and anyone that supports homosexuals. Apparently they have nothing better to do than show the world how truly pathetic they are. Any deity that accepts them as worshipers is clearly a brain dead tyrant unfit to be worshipped. One of their more recent rants was against singer Taylor Swift for apparently encouraging her fans to fornicate. If you're looking for a group of people that shouldn't fuck Fred, look no further than you and your followers. The lot of you should be sterilized before you add any new members to your little group of inbred mutants. Heaven, Hell and Earth would all be better places without your lot. Do the world a favor, crawl back under that rock you came from and go back to licking the shit out of your nonexistent God's asshole.