At Long Last

  After about two years of delays due to Covid-19, manufacturing problems etc., my Hexacube dice order is finally on its way to me. I have a tracking number so I'll know how close the order is to arriving. Estimates have it arriving Nov. 4th. My Intel card game is also slated to arrive on the 4th.

  The .PDF version of the main Dungeon Bitches rulebook was released on Halloween. It can be purchased from DriveThruRPG.com. The print version of the main book and the .PDFs of the supplements will eventually be made available from the same seller. I'm getting copies of those items as part of the Kickstarter.

  It looks like the Spiral Dice Kickstarter is making headway. From what the seller says, his dice order should've arrived from Europe on Oct. 25th. He'll be locking in the buyers' addresses soon and the dice should be on their way to us about a month after that. The Spiral Dice Hacker's Guide and the Sapio Core Rules were created to make use of the dice. The Hacker's Guide isn't yet available but the Core Rules can be purchased from the site. Sapio: Zombies is also being created as a part of this Kickstarter. The Hacker's Guide, Core Rules and Sapio: Zombies are included in this Kickstarter. I've downloaded a dice rolling app on my smartphone and added a set of digital Spiral Dice to it. Paying for the app allows me to create other digital dice bags to add to the ones that come with the app. I've added Fudge dice, averaging dice, alignment dice and Asylum marbles to the app along with the Spiral Dice.

  The Gwar concert at the Rave is fast approaching. Four days later, I officially turn 60. Ten years ago, my health started to decline. I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. A cancerous polyp was found in my ascending colon resulting in its removal. I lost my right testicle to cancer. I had to undergo chemo for both cancers. My right hip socket deteriorated and partially collapsed. In order to get the hip replacement surgery, I had to get my a1c below 7.2. While I was working on that, my gall bladder got infected and had to be removed.

  My hip is now replaced but my legs still get sore if I stand for long periods of time. Right now, my health has stabilized somewhat. My a1c has been around 7.0. I'm free of cancer. My last visit to my nephrologist went well. Let's hope things don't take a turn for the worst. 

Catching Up

  It's been a while since I last made a blog entry so it's time to catch up. In early July, I had finished the first of four rounds of chemo. I felt pretty good and I worked that Fourth of July. Since it was a holiday week, I had the next three days off. Things went downhill very quickly. It turns out that my immune system had been severely compromised by the chemo and I ended up catching pneumonia. An ambulance had to be called and I spent about a week in the ICU.
  GenCon got cancelled. I couldn't risk the possibility that I could get sick again while in Indianapolis. This fucking sucked because I was looking forward to the gaming events I had scheduled. As compensation, I ordered three books from Cubicle 7 for The One Ring rpg; Erebor, Horse Lords of Rohan and Journeys and Maps. I've received the Horse Lords book. The other two will come after they're printed.
  Another item I purchased was a paracord slungshot I saw in a YouTube video. It's referred to incorrectly as a Monkey's Fist. Technically, the monkey's fist is the knot wrapped around the 8 ounce phenolic resin ball that gives the weapon its flail like head. Here's the video. As you can clearly see, it's a nasty weapon. I've had to straighten out a snafu with my FMLA paperwork. Fortunately, things worked out and I'm covered until Sept. 30th. I'm debating whether or not I want to order a Sharpshooter keychain. This device is a form of self defense keychain that allows you to do Kubotan style strikes. In addition, you can deploy a length of paracord that allows you to lash out at your attacker with flail like strikes from your keys. Here's a video.

Undergoing Chemo Again

  Tomorrow will my third of twenty chemo treatments. So far, there's not much to report. None of the side effects have kicked in yet but that's simply a matter of time. My hair will, in all likelihood, start falling out sometime in the next three to six weeks. How much nausea I'll suffer remains to be seen. Each session starts out with me receiving anti-nausea drugs and I have three anti-nausea drugs at home; prochlorperazine, ondansetron and Dexamethasone. The first two I take as needed, the last one I take on the Saturdays, Sundays and Mondays after that week's sessions. It's a five days on, sixteen days off cycle. Four cycles total. I'm going to try to work during the 16 day off periods and I'm still thinking that I'll be able to attend GenCon this year. My oncologist worked out the schedule so that GenCon falls during an off period.

Random Bits

  After spending about $1,200.00 on medical bills, I decided to indulge myself a little. First up, on 4/15/16, I placed an order with The Cabil for the latest editions of Hol and Buttery Wholesomeness. I'm still waiting for them to arrive and my email inquiries regarding the status of my order have gone unanswered. If something doesn't happen soon, I'm going to inform PayPal about this order and see if they can get a response. Second up, I've ordered a ballhood on eBay. Since it's a custom order, it will take a while to get here but it will be worth the wait. Now I realize that this wasn't the smartest move. Why order something like this when I have no sex life? It seems pointless and wasteful. Still I want to see what it's like to wear one and I had some extra money.

  A second CT scan has revealed that the lymph node has gotten bigger. This is both good and bad news. It's bad because it means whatever caused it to enlarge is still present. It's good because the doctor feels that they can retry the ultrasound technique that failed last time they tried to biopsy it. I'll be undergoing said procedure on 5/31/16. My biggest fear is that the biopsy will reveal that I have another form of cancer and I'll have to undergo more chemotherapy.
  Plans for this year's GenCon are progressing. The hotel room has been reserved and event tickets purchased. Despite my planning, things didn't work out as I'd hoped they would. I had to wait almost 4 hours before I could make my hotel reservation. As a result, I'm several miles outside the convention area and I'll have to drive to it everyday and pay for parking. It's either that or find a bus or shuttle service to and from the area. When it came time to register for events, I logged onto my account before registration went live, picked 7 events that I wanted to play and put them on my wish list. The second registration went live, I submitted my wish list for processing. The problem was I ended up 5,744th in line for processing. 5 of the 7 events filled up before my list was processed. I couldn't add any replacement events until my list was processed and then I had to get back in line. When all was said and done, I ended up with 4 events, Wraith, Doctor Who, The One Ring and Luchador. I've been paying on my credit card bill and I want to eventually shift some money to my Serve and Simple card accounts so I'll have some spending money for the convention.

News Bits

  The right radical orchiectomy went well. The incisions are healing and there has been little in the way of pain. I have to set up an appointment with Dr. Matkov so he can tell me what was wrong with my right testicle. Update: My oncologist, Dr. Jefferies, gave me the orchiectomy results this past Tuesday. It's official, I had stage 1 seminoma (testicular cancer). Since it was confined to my right testicle, it's pretty much gone. My tumor markers are going to have to monitored every three months to make sure there's no recurrence. This fucking sucks. I undergo a colectomy and chemotherapy in order to rid myself of colon cancer only to end up with seminoma. Then I undergo an orchiectomy to get rid of the seminoma. The enlarged lymph node has yet to be analyzed. For all I know, a third form of cancer is fucking up some other part of my body.

  My erectile dysfunction appears to have worsened. I no longer get anything even approaching a decent erection anymore. I'm less of a man now than I've ever been. Not that I've ever been much of a man even when my penis worked and I had two functioning testicles. Women ignored me then. They have even more reason to ignore me now.

  My life has been little more than a shining example of mediocrity. I've made little, if any, impact on anything. Nothing I've done has amounted to anything significant. I used to think that I was smart and that said intellect would land me a decent job and lead to a decent life. I couldn't have been more wrong. Despite having health insurance and living with my parents, I'm barely making ends meet. One major financial crisis and I'm screwed. I have virtually no social life. The only time I usually see my friends is when we get together for gaming. And dating is out of the question. No woman wants what I have to offer. While any one particular flaw might not be enough to scare them away, all of them together will easily do the trick. The total, in this case, is far greater than the sum of the parts.

  That being the case, it means that the later years of my life are going to be lonely ones. After Mom and Dad die, I'll probably have to sell the house. Since I'm their executor, I'll be the one settling their estate. Jeff and I are the primary beneficiaries for now. With them gone, it will just be me. 

How things are going so far

  Things were improving earlier this year. I had finally paid off both my MasterCard and Discover accounts. Finally, I'd have enough money to build up my checking and savings accounts. Then I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. This meant that I was going to be on medication for the rest of my life. A setback, yes, but since I had insurance, some of the cost would be absorbed by my insurance. Then a routine colonoscopy turned up a 1cm. cancerous polyp. That meant surgery. The cost of the presurgery tests and the surgery itself, even with insurance, was expensive. I had to go on medical leave from work, so I didn't have as much money coming in. Even with the $1,000.00 my Mom and Dad gave me to help pay bills, I still had to pay for some things via credit card. The surgery went well, but the cancer had entered my lymph nodes. This meant chemotherapy. 12 cycles of chemotherapy.

  Why is it that when I see a light at the end of the tunnel it's always the headlight of an oncoming train? It seems like no matter what I do, I can't get ahead financially. I clear away most of my credit card debt and now I have health problems. End result, more damn debt. I'm due to return to work some time in December. I'll still be undergoing chemo, but I have no choice. I can't afford to take any more time off. And when those treatments are done, what will happen next to fuck me over? Another health crisis? An accident? What? It would be really nice if after all this is done, I could enjoy a period of financial stability. One where I could pay down my credit card, clear away some bills and build up my bank accounts. I'd like to be able to attend Gen Con this year. 

The Upcoming Chemotherapy Treatment

  At some point in the not too distant future, I will be starting chemotherapy. This is because some cancer cells from the malignant polyp penetrated my intestinal wall and got into a lymph node. Even though this node, along with 19 others, was removed during the colectomy, some cancer cells may have gotten into my bloodstream or lymphatic system. This could lead to the cancer recurring at some point in the future. Chemotherapy is designed to kill fast dividing cells like cancer. Unfortunately, other fast dividing cells, like bone marrow, get killed as well.

  The drug cocktail the oncologist wants to use consists of the following three drugs, 5-Fluorouracil (5-FU), Oxaliplatin and Leucovorin. The first two drugs have a lengthy list of side effects. While I won't necessarily suffer all the listed side effects, the treatment will still wreck havoc on my system. They want me to be part of a clinical study and I've agreed. They want to see if six treatments are as effective as twelve. They also want to see if the drug celocoxib, also known as Celebrex, can prevent the formation of intestinal polyps. I'm hoping to get into one of the six treatment groups for two reasons, it'll cost me less and I'll suffer less side effects. The medical costs are racking up fast and I have yet to receive my first disability payment. While the insurance I have through work pays for most of it, what's left in a few instances has been quite substantial. My biggest worry is that at some point the insurance will stop covering the treatments and I'll be stuck with the entire bill. I'll post more as things progress.

The Results of the Biopsy

  The appointment I had with the surgeon that did my colectomy brought news of a less than rosy nature. The cancer that was in my intestines has affected one of my lymph nodes. This means that my cancer is officially at stage 3. I have an appointment with an oncologist this Wednesday to go over my treatment options. Dr. Needle said that chemotherapy is the most likely course of action. Given what I know about chemotherapy, this won't be a pleasant experience. On the plus side, I've heard that there are a variety of chemotherapy treatments out there and not all of them make you sick, kill your appetite and cause massive hair loss. I'm not looking forward to this but I have little choice. Doing nothing means the cancer will spread and I'll end up at stage 4. Stage 4 is pretty much death. I can't let that happen. The cancer can still be stopped.